My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
