I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
