Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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