He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I intend to get homeless drunk
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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