I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
