I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
