oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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