Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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