Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Randomize
