i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
