We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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