Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
