i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize