So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
