I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
