Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
The feeling are messing with the penis
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
