So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
well, you know. whores of a feather.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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