we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
