OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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