There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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