btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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