I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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