we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize