quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
