This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
