Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
