Non-Jews are for practice
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize