yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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