Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
