dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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