Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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