just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Randomize