Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize