She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
