Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Randomize
