the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
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