Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
