problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
