I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
