the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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