i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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