Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
