Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
