i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
