You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
