Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize