All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
