Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
