im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
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