You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize
