no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
