"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
