Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
